But, Seriously…

Daily Diets of an Ephemeral Cultural Stalker

TOP 13 SUPERHEROES THAT WILL BE GREAT AS PORN STUD (And It’s Not Superman)

with one comment

13. Animal Man
The name says it all: he’s an animal!

12. Dr. Manhattan
He’s cold, right. But he is willing, and able, to satisfy. And he’s blue. Don’t let Captain Kirk have all the fun –girls have the right too.

11. Aquaman
Like Namor, but blond. And he’s not cocky enough. I think his mixed origin makes him a little bit insecure. A major draw back for being a stud.

10. Major Bummer
The ultimate “Why-the-f*@k-do-I-care” stud.

9. Dr. Strange
Mature. Wise. And can make your fantasy happen.

8. Silver Surfer
Look, he IS a surfer. And you could have a cosmic orgasm.

7. Daredevil
He’s so goddamn sensitive!

6. Thor
Ocupation: freelance god, with beautiful blond hair. And Nordic.

5. Hawkeye
Always hit the right spot!
(Oliver Queen a.k.a. Green Arrow has potential. But he’s rather old. And he’s a goddamn socialist!)

4. Namor
Cool. Proud of his body. A prince. The ultimate fantasy object. Cocky as hell, but I’ll bet it’s because he got a good one –cock, I mean.

3. Batman
The stamina. The resourceful and imaginative moves. The gadget. And a flare of kinkiness too.

2. Wolverine
‘Nuff said.

1. Plastic Man
The elasticity alone would do it. The power to stretch at will? And he’s definitely a fun guy.

And why not Superman?

“Man of Steel”? Meh! It will be a punishment to have sex with this dude –and not in the good way. And lethal –as shown by “The Pro” (a comic by Garth Ennis & Amanda Conner –although, strictly speaking, it wasn’t Superman, but an “archetype” of “Superman” –but it does show you what happened when “Superman” ejaculate.). And he will not very imaginative either in bed.

Spiderman?
Too much jokes when he’s in costume, and too gloomy when he’s not.

Reed Richards/Mr. Fantastic?
Sure, he can stretch. But he always over think it.

Captain America?
Can you imagine feeling patriotic doing porn? It wouldn’t be… fun.

The Flash?
Forget it. No porn stud bragging about how “fast” he is.

Written by hikmatdarmawan

December 10, 2010 at 9:14 pm

One Response

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  1. Gundala would make a good stud, what with his ability to generate electricity (I would surmise (read: fantasize?) he can generate lightning/electricity not necessarily from his palms ho ho. Ooooo, tingling.

    Alas, his wife, Merpati…..

    gandif

    December 11, 2010 at 12:45 am


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